Thursday, March 01, 2007

I found a whole heap of marriage jokes

this one got me laughing so hard...

A little boy, at a wedding looks at his mom and says, "Mommy, why does the girl wear white?"His mom replies, "The bride is in white because she's happy and this is the happiest day of her life."The boy thinks about this, and then says, "Well then, why is the boy wearing black?"

I post the rest when I get some sleep... I'm so tired...

If it's true that girls are inclined to marry men like their fathers, it is understandable why so many mothers cry so much at weddings

Getting married is very much like going to the restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

It's true that all men are born free and equal, but some of them get married!

There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found himself married. A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found himself divorced.

Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad?
Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it.

Son: Is it true? Dad, I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries.
Father: That happens everywhere, son, everywhere!

A husband is living proof that a wife can take a joke

Always talk to your wife while you're making love... if there's a phone handy

Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.

Feminists are OK, I just wouldn't want my sister to marry one.

If your wife wants to learn how to drive, don't stand in her way

Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible

Love: An obsessive delusion that is cured by marriage.

Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot

Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred

Men have a much better time of it than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier. --H.L. Mencken

My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it.

My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.

My wife ran off with my best friend last week. I miss him!

The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free.

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. -- Groucho Marx

To keep your marriage brimming
With love in the marriage cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
Whenever you're right, shut up. -- Nash

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