When I was sixteen... I was madly in love... and madly insecure as well. I remember listening to this song and I told a close friend that this was what I wanted in my relationship:
she said I don't know if I've ever been good enough
I'm a little bit rusty, and I think my head is caving in
and I don't know if I've ever been really loved
by a hand that's touched me, and I feel like something's gonna give
and I'm a little bit angry, well
this ain't over, no not here, not while I still need you around
you don't owe me, we might change it
yeah we just might feel good
(CHORUS)
I wanna push you around, well I will, well I will
I wanna push you down, well I will, well I will
I wanna take you for granted, I wanna take you for granted
I will, I will
she said I don't know why you ever would lie to me
like I'm a little untrusting when I think that the truth is gonna hurt ya
and I don't know why you couldn't just stay with me
you couldn't stand to be near me
when my face don't seem to want to shine
cuz it's a little bit dirty, well
don't just stand there, sayin nice things to me
cause I've been cheated, I've been wronged, and you
you don't know me, well I can't change
Well, I won't do anything at all
(CHORUS)
oh but don't bowl me over
just wait a minute well it kinda fell apart, things get so crazy, crazy
don't rush this baby, don't rush this baby
(CHORUS)
He was horrified. He was a mutual friend of ours and he said he would kill me if I treated her that way. The funny thing is he didn't understand what I meant by wanting our relationship to be like 'Push'.
I wanted the confidence to be able to take her for granted. No in the bad sense. But in the sense that I'd always know that she would be there when ever I needed her or whenever I wanted to see her. To know that she was mine and mine alone. That I wouldn't have to worry about guys hitting on her or trying to pick her up.
Like I said. I was an insecure bugger. But I still love the song :)
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
First kiss...
romantic little poem I made :D
Staring eye to eye
but a little shy
We're going to kiss!
Oh my... oh my!
Should I lean in
or play it cool?
We're gonna kiss!
Don't mess up fool!
Is my breath bad?
Thank God I didn't smoke!
Damn, we're gonna kiss!
No joke!
Should I put my hand
behind her neck?
Kiss... kiss... kissing...
to 'Want You Back'!
Should I stick in
a little tongue action
Or just give hers
a little suction!
Should I close my eyes?
Or keep them open?
Oh time to kiss!
Sweet heavens!
A moment I'll always
keep close to the heart!
As our lips began to touch
She lets out fart!
The smell went
straight to my head
Before my first kiss
I fell down dead!
Staring eye to eye
but a little shy
We're going to kiss!
Oh my... oh my!
Should I lean in
or play it cool?
We're gonna kiss!
Don't mess up fool!
Is my breath bad?
Thank God I didn't smoke!
Damn, we're gonna kiss!
No joke!
Should I put my hand
behind her neck?
Kiss... kiss... kissing...
to 'Want You Back'!
Should I stick in
a little tongue action
Or just give hers
a little suction!
Should I close my eyes?
Or keep them open?
Oh time to kiss!
Sweet heavens!
A moment I'll always
keep close to the heart!
As our lips began to touch
She lets out fart!
The smell went
straight to my head
Before my first kiss
I fell down dead!
New section for TheWarpedMind
Vinepedia.... I had so much fun writing the nigganese post that I'm calling out to you guys (my readers) to help me work on this section... post a question that you have about anything under the sky... and I'll vinepedia it for you :)
this is gonna be fun!
ok! meeting now! later peeps
this is gonna be fun!
ok! meeting now! later peeps
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Tagged by Jade
5 things found in my bag:
1. I can't find my freakin bag let alone whats in it!
5 things found in my wallet:
1. Money
2. IC
3. picture of baby (my dog... not my woman)
4. Name cards
5. Driving license
5 favourite things in my room:
1. My computer!!!!!!!!!!!
2. My bed
3. My photo album
4. My treasure box (not copying you la jade.. really one!)
5. My dog!
5 things I always wanted to do:
1. visit my old high school mates in Nottingham again
2. get a novel published
3. become a famous blogger
4. have children
5. work as a full time writer
5 things I'm currently into:
1.my blog
2. battle stations (application in facebook)
3. drinking booze (:D)
4. hanging out with my buddies
5. eating jap food
List out the top 4 presents you wish for:
1. a new hp
2. internship to end!
3. holidays!
4. a publisher for Strawberry Milkshake
The person who tagged you is:
Ah Jeedddd....
Your 5 impressions of him/her:
1. doesn't like reading ><~
2. chirpy
3. penang kia!
4. photo freak
5. a good friend
Most memorable thing he/she has done to you:
talk to me for 3 hours while ryan and u jinn were snoring at the back of the car on the way back from penang to kl
If he/she becomes your lover, you will:
shoot her
If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be:
because I shot her too much
Pass the quiz to 5 people!
1. Eunice
2. Shirley
3. Pinky
4. Felicia
5. Yelena
man... I was THAT bored I did the tag -__-
1. I can't find my freakin bag let alone whats in it!
5 things found in my wallet:
1. Money
2. IC
3. picture of baby (my dog... not my woman)
4. Name cards
5. Driving license
5 favourite things in my room:
1. My computer!!!!!!!!!!!
2. My bed
3. My photo album
4. My treasure box (not copying you la jade.. really one!)
5. My dog!
5 things I always wanted to do:
1. visit my old high school mates in Nottingham again
2. get a novel published
3. become a famous blogger
4. have children
5. work as a full time writer
5 things I'm currently into:
1.my blog
2. battle stations (application in facebook)
3. drinking booze (:D)
4. hanging out with my buddies
5. eating jap food
List out the top 4 presents you wish for:
1. a new hp
2. internship to end!
3. holidays!
4. a publisher for Strawberry Milkshake
The person who tagged you is:
Ah Jeedddd....
Your 5 impressions of him/her:
1. doesn't like reading ><~
2. chirpy
3. penang kia!
4. photo freak
5. a good friend
Most memorable thing he/she has done to you:
talk to me for 3 hours while ryan and u jinn were snoring at the back of the car on the way back from penang to kl
If he/she becomes your lover, you will:
shoot her
If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be:
because I shot her too much
Pass the quiz to 5 people!
1. Eunice
2. Shirley
3. Pinky
4. Felicia
5. Yelena
man... I was THAT bored I did the tag -__-
Vinepedia brings you : Nigganese!
Ok. The question why do chinkies and nigga’s sound alike when they speak has arisen for the fearsome sounding Mr. SHAMAN. I’ve taken a lot of time to research on this topic to answer this question. I consulted vinepedia for my research.
First of all, did you know that Chinese and blacks actually are actually from the same racial decent? Yes they are. They were called the Nigganese. Which is Sanskrit for ‘We rule basketball!’
Yeap. Even back then, they were already working on gene streaming for the NBA dominant monsters that are Yao Ming and Kobe Bryant!
Anyway, back on topic. They were the most developed empire in their hay day. In fact, they were the first to develop nuclear power; which was their ultimate downfall. In the capital of their empire ‘Ikidyounot’, they had a major crisis when their main supply of nuclear power had a meltdown.
This killed hundreds of thousands of Nigganese. But their blood was strong and they survived it. But the split occurred here as the race took to two different methods to cleanse the nuclear contamination.
One halve, turned to dipping themselves in hot tea to detoxify the poison from nuclear meltdown. They used boiling tea and put it into a barrel. Then they soaked themselves in the tea until the barrel overflowed with their sweat and tea. This effectively tea stained their skins and they became yellow.
The other halve, turn to the sun as their source of detoxification. A similar process, the focus being on sweating out the toxins. However, they performed insane amounts of exercise in the hot boiling sun instead of dipping themselves in tea. Through this process, they became super athletic and muscular. However, they spent so much time in the sun that they were burnt charcoal black.
The yellow people also began to eat everything and anything that could be eaten. From tiger dicks to porcupines. This effectively poisoned them and stunted their growth. Which is why they aren’t as big as their black counterparts.
The blacks where as only took beer and fried chicken. Which is the dream meal for growing muscles. We ALL know BEER is GOOD for you. So the next time you look at a black guy’s muscles and feel envious… the solution is simple… drown yourself in beer.
The final stages of the split came in their renaming themselves from their original race, Nigganese. The yellow counterparts began practicing kung fu as a way of life. At first, they wanted to called themselves, ‘I-practice-kungfu-and-will-kiss-your-sorry-ass-nese’ but that was too long. Since they mastered the art of chi, they simplified it and became the Chi – nese.
The black dudes where as suffered severe brain damage from over exercising and the hot sun and lost 80% of their IQ. So they decided to simplify the name from Nigganese to simply ‘nigga’.
There you have it. The REAL reason and HISTORY behind the chinks and nigga’s speaking alike. They were actually one people until the nuclear meltdown. So you Chinese and Niggas, remember your roots and stop killing each other to sell drugs to stupid white kids. Peace!
First of all, did you know that Chinese and blacks actually are actually from the same racial decent? Yes they are. They were called the Nigganese. Which is Sanskrit for ‘We rule basketball!’
Yeap. Even back then, they were already working on gene streaming for the NBA dominant monsters that are Yao Ming and Kobe Bryant!
Anyway, back on topic. They were the most developed empire in their hay day. In fact, they were the first to develop nuclear power; which was their ultimate downfall. In the capital of their empire ‘Ikidyounot’, they had a major crisis when their main supply of nuclear power had a meltdown.
This killed hundreds of thousands of Nigganese. But their blood was strong and they survived it. But the split occurred here as the race took to two different methods to cleanse the nuclear contamination.
One halve, turned to dipping themselves in hot tea to detoxify the poison from nuclear meltdown. They used boiling tea and put it into a barrel. Then they soaked themselves in the tea until the barrel overflowed with their sweat and tea. This effectively tea stained their skins and they became yellow.
The other halve, turn to the sun as their source of detoxification. A similar process, the focus being on sweating out the toxins. However, they performed insane amounts of exercise in the hot boiling sun instead of dipping themselves in tea. Through this process, they became super athletic and muscular. However, they spent so much time in the sun that they were burnt charcoal black.
The yellow people also began to eat everything and anything that could be eaten. From tiger dicks to porcupines. This effectively poisoned them and stunted their growth. Which is why they aren’t as big as their black counterparts.
The blacks where as only took beer and fried chicken. Which is the dream meal for growing muscles. We ALL know BEER is GOOD for you. So the next time you look at a black guy’s muscles and feel envious… the solution is simple… drown yourself in beer.
The final stages of the split came in their renaming themselves from their original race, Nigganese. The yellow counterparts began practicing kung fu as a way of life. At first, they wanted to called themselves, ‘I-practice-kungfu-and-will-kiss-your-sorry-ass-nese’ but that was too long. Since they mastered the art of chi, they simplified it and became the Chi – nese.
The black dudes where as suffered severe brain damage from over exercising and the hot sun and lost 80% of their IQ. So they decided to simplify the name from Nigganese to simply ‘nigga’.
There you have it. The REAL reason and HISTORY behind the chinks and nigga’s speaking alike. They were actually one people until the nuclear meltdown. So you Chinese and Niggas, remember your roots and stop killing each other to sell drugs to stupid white kids. Peace!
Monday, April 28, 2008
Yellow people talk ;)
1) That's not right..........................Sum Ting Wong
2) Are you harboring a fugitive? ........Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP............................Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man.............................. Dum Fuk
5) Small Horse..............................Tai Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the Beach?..............Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped into a coffee table..........Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni
8) I think you need a face lift............Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here...................WaoSo Dim
10) I thought you were on a diet........Wai Yu Mun Ching
11) This is a tow away zone.............,No Pah King
12) Our meeting is next week............Wai Yu Kum Nao
13) Staying out of sight...................Lei Ying Lo1
4) He's cleaning his automobile.........Wa Shing Ka
15) Your body odor is offensive.........Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great...................................Fa kin Su Pa
2) Are you harboring a fugitive? ........Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP............................Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man.............................. Dum Fuk
5) Small Horse..............................Tai Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the Beach?..............Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped into a coffee table..........Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni
8) I think you need a face lift............Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here...................WaoSo Dim
10) I thought you were on a diet........Wai Yu Mun Ching
11) This is a tow away zone.............,No Pah King
12) Our meeting is next week............Wai Yu Kum Nao
13) Staying out of sight...................Lei Ying Lo1
4) He's cleaning his automobile.........Wa Shing Ka
15) Your body odor is offensive.........Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great...................................Fa kin Su Pa
Friday, April 25, 2008
Fiction press...
I've never been one to be fussy about poems or writing in general. In fact my writing's far from perfect and I realise and cherish that; as it means I have more to learn and I can still improve. When you stop improving I feel it would be time to stop writing completely if you ask me.
Reading the poems (in particular) at fiction press, I no longer believe that EVERYONE can write. A lot of the poem have one major flaw: they are too self absorbed. While the imagery may be something to be impressed about in many of the poems, the poems lack two very substancial ingredients: Structure and craft.
The images are all emotion spurts. They come strong but don't last because the writer does not do it credit as a whole for the poem. Rather than explaining or exploring the powerful images they have created, they move on to try to create OTHER powerful images. All disjointed. All random.
Random images do NOT constitute a good poem. If there is no coherency in your poem as to the images, how are people supposed to understand what you are writing? If there is no structured story in your poems, what message can you convey? None. Isn't the whole point of a poem to convery a message? I think so. In fact, many times, a GOOD poem will have undertones and implicit messages in addition to explicit messages. Many writers fail to do this. This is something I'm still trying to master myself.
Reading other peoples poems has opened my eyes alot. I'm not talking about reading GREAT poets like Hemmingway or Blake. I'm talking about reading EVERYDAY people's poems. I can see what I like and what I want to inculcate into my own writing. And I see my own weaknesses as a writer as well. It is truely an eye opening experience.
I now believe anyone can write... but not EVERYONE can write GOOD poems.
Reading the poems (in particular) at fiction press, I no longer believe that EVERYONE can write. A lot of the poem have one major flaw: they are too self absorbed. While the imagery may be something to be impressed about in many of the poems, the poems lack two very substancial ingredients: Structure and craft.
The images are all emotion spurts. They come strong but don't last because the writer does not do it credit as a whole for the poem. Rather than explaining or exploring the powerful images they have created, they move on to try to create OTHER powerful images. All disjointed. All random.
Random images do NOT constitute a good poem. If there is no coherency in your poem as to the images, how are people supposed to understand what you are writing? If there is no structured story in your poems, what message can you convey? None. Isn't the whole point of a poem to convery a message? I think so. In fact, many times, a GOOD poem will have undertones and implicit messages in addition to explicit messages. Many writers fail to do this. This is something I'm still trying to master myself.
Reading other peoples poems has opened my eyes alot. I'm not talking about reading GREAT poets like Hemmingway or Blake. I'm talking about reading EVERYDAY people's poems. I can see what I like and what I want to inculcate into my own writing. And I see my own weaknesses as a writer as well. It is truely an eye opening experience.
I now believe anyone can write... but not EVERYONE can write GOOD poems.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
When I next fall in love
Ok... so I've been single for the longest time! My gran ma has been asking me to find a nice 'sum bo' (in law) for my ailing mother who is forever sick... but that is a different rant all together. Today I want to rant talk about the next girl I'm going to fall in love with...
First of all the girl I fall in love with... has to have gorgeous eyes... One brown and one green to be exact! I can't make up my mind which I like better.... green.... sexy! brown... cute.... sexy... cute... sexy... cute... sexy... cute... so I'll have both!
Then she has to have a fabulous figure... I want my next love to be a model.... for mens clothes! Why you ask me? Well... she's a woman... obviously she's not going to be using all the freebie clothes that she gets from modelling... so I get them! Isn't that just a great idea! I know! I know! I thought about it all by myself... :D
She has to be voluptous... preferbly in the tummy area... the bigger the better... Why? I'm no slim jim... it feels good to have some one fatter and rounder than you as your other half... every time you look at them naked... the thought 'THANK GOD I CUT DOWN ON MY CARBS' comes to mind... it appeals to the ego...
Hmm... what else?
Yes how could I forget! She should be a multi-millionaire.... preferbly one who inherited it rather than worked for... you ask why again? WELL... the answer is obvious! So she can't bitch at me for burning money she worked her ass off for... its inherited and meant to be burn... trust me you'll kill a lot of the bitching this way XD...
My new woman should also be a Dunhill chain smoker... that doesn't finish 3/4 of the ciggarettes... leaving me 3/4 of a free ciggarette! Imagine the amount of money I'll save monthly... wait.. YEARLY!
My next woman should also be a virgin... if they don't know anything about sex... they can't call you crap in bed now can they :D! Actually scratch that... my next woman should give excellent head but is squemish about being 'kissed there'... this was I don't have to worry about knocking her up... or worry about returning the favor to her! See! Everyone is happy!
My next woman should also be a devil worshipper... since there's not one more emo and nasty than me... I'll be the deity of her world! wooooo... godhood and blow jobs in one package... can things get ANY better :D?
Ok la... so these are my requirements for a woman... my next woman to be exact! If you fit the requirements or have a sister who fits them (preferbly already walking... I'm patient but not THAT patient)... do drop me a message here yea! :D
MCP signing off :p
First of all the girl I fall in love with... has to have gorgeous eyes... One brown and one green to be exact! I can't make up my mind which I like better.... green.... sexy! brown... cute.... sexy... cute... sexy... cute... sexy... cute... so I'll have both!
Then she has to have a fabulous figure... I want my next love to be a model.... for mens clothes! Why you ask me? Well... she's a woman... obviously she's not going to be using all the freebie clothes that she gets from modelling... so I get them! Isn't that just a great idea! I know! I know! I thought about it all by myself... :D
She has to be voluptous... preferbly in the tummy area... the bigger the better... Why? I'm no slim jim... it feels good to have some one fatter and rounder than you as your other half... every time you look at them naked... the thought 'THANK GOD I CUT DOWN ON MY CARBS' comes to mind... it appeals to the ego...
Hmm... what else?
Yes how could I forget! She should be a multi-millionaire.... preferbly one who inherited it rather than worked for... you ask why again? WELL... the answer is obvious! So she can't bitch at me for burning money she worked her ass off for... its inherited and meant to be burn... trust me you'll kill a lot of the bitching this way XD...
My new woman should also be a Dunhill chain smoker... that doesn't finish 3/4 of the ciggarettes... leaving me 3/4 of a free ciggarette! Imagine the amount of money I'll save monthly... wait.. YEARLY!
My next woman should also be a virgin... if they don't know anything about sex... they can't call you crap in bed now can they :D! Actually scratch that... my next woman should give excellent head but is squemish about being 'kissed there'... this was I don't have to worry about knocking her up... or worry about returning the favor to her! See! Everyone is happy!
My next woman should also be a devil worshipper... since there's not one more emo and nasty than me... I'll be the deity of her world! wooooo... godhood and blow jobs in one package... can things get ANY better :D?
Ok la... so these are my requirements for a woman... my next woman to be exact! If you fit the requirements or have a sister who fits them (preferbly already walking... I'm patient but not THAT patient)... do drop me a message here yea! :D
MCP signing off :p
Wise Proverbs from 7 year olds
something interesting and hilarious yelena asked me to read during work. :P
A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. For a quiz, she gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.
It’s hard to believe these were actually done by first grade kids (6 or 7 year-olds)!
* Strike while the ………insect is close.
* Never underestimate the power of…………ants.
* Don’t bite the hand that………………..looks dirty.
* Better to be safe than…………….punch a grade 7 boy.
* If you lie down with dogs, you’ll…….stink in the morning.
* It’s always darkest before…………DaylightSaving Time.
* You can lead a horse to water but………..how?
* No news is…………………………….impossible.
* A miss is as good as a………………….Mr.
* You can’t teach an old dog new…………..maths.
* Love all, trust………………………..me.
* The pen is mightier than the…………….pigs.
* An idle mind is…………………the best way to relax.
* Where there’s smoke there’s……………..pollution.
* Happy the bride who……………gets all the presents.
* A penny saved is……………………….not much.
* Two’s company, three’s…………………the Musketeers.
* Don’t put off till tomorrow what….you put on to go to bed.
* Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and……….you have to blow your nose.
* There are none so blind as……………. Stevie Wonder.
* Children should be seen and not………….smacked or grounded.
* If at first you don’t succeed……………get new batteries.
* You get out of something only what you……see in the picture on the box.
* When the blind leadeth the blind……..get out of the way.
* And the favorite:
* Better late than……………………….pregnant
A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. For a quiz, she gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.
It’s hard to believe these were actually done by first grade kids (6 or 7 year-olds)!
* Strike while the ………insect is close.
* Never underestimate the power of…………ants.
* Don’t bite the hand that………………..looks dirty.
* Better to be safe than…………….punch a grade 7 boy.
* If you lie down with dogs, you’ll…….stink in the morning.
* It’s always darkest before…………DaylightSaving Time.
* You can lead a horse to water but………..how?
* No news is…………………………….impossible.
* A miss is as good as a………………….Mr.
* You can’t teach an old dog new…………..maths.
* Love all, trust………………………..me.
* The pen is mightier than the…………….pigs.
* An idle mind is…………………the best way to relax.
* Where there’s smoke there’s……………..pollution.
* Happy the bride who……………gets all the presents.
* A penny saved is……………………….not much.
* Two’s company, three’s…………………the Musketeers.
* Don’t put off till tomorrow what….you put on to go to bed.
* Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and……….you have to blow your nose.
* There are none so blind as……………. Stevie Wonder.
* Children should be seen and not………….smacked or grounded.
* If at first you don’t succeed……………get new batteries.
* You get out of something only what you……see in the picture on the box.
* When the blind leadeth the blind……..get out of the way.
* And the favorite:
* Better late than……………………….pregnant
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Short story :)
It was hot and yet cold due to the stupid wind factor. The sun was blazing and the wind was chilling. 'Perfect weather for walking the fat mutt,' he grumbled to himself. Then his aforementioned mutt, seemed to sense his unwillingness and jumped on him to lick his face.
'You're not bribing me that easily Suki! It'll take more than a few kisses for you to get away with me having to walk you in this weather. I'll probably catch pneumonia and heat stroke on the same day!'
She barked at him and wagged her tail happily.
'I'm being serious. Don't you think I'm kidding young lady. You owe me big time for this walk!' he said petting her head and then leaned to kiss her nose.
'That's cute. You talk to you dog,' a soft voice came.
He raised his head to and found himself staring at a pair of legs that never seemed to end. Slowly he lifted up his head to complete the view. She was beautiful! Baby brown eyes, long brown hair and a smile that bespoke a good sense of humor and mischieviousness. The weather was the last thing on his mind then.
'Doesn't everyone?' he asked.
'I don't know about everyone. But I used to talk to my dog too. Sometime it seems like they speak right back to you!' she said, squatting to take a better look at Suki.
'Yea. Suki defintely understands tho. She listens and does the exact opposite of what you tell her to do. Why did you say used to?'
'Our dog died last summer. She got hit by a car.' she pouted and absently stroked Suki's fur.
'I'm sorry to hear that. Must have been painful. I can't imagine anything happening to this little rascal.' Then he squatted too, and hugged Suki. The thought of losing her had stabbed at him and he felt guilty about complaining that he had to walk her.
'Whats her name?'
'Suki. It means beloved in Japenese. And she's definitely loved in our family,' he smiled.
'She's gorgeous. She's a cocker spaniel right? Tho I've never seen one this color before,' she asked.
'She's mixed, just like her owner. She's a British-American cocket spaniel. She transends culture in her little mind.' Suki decided that she was enjoying the attention and placed her forepaws on the girls arms and reached to lick her face.
'She's friendly.'
'She's normally scared of strangers. She must like you.' He turned Suki's face towards his own. 'Who's a big flirt with pretty girls? Hmm... Suki? You shameless flirt.'
Suki wagged her tail and gave his face a thorough licking. Laughing, he said 'Its hot Suki, but not so hot that I wanna be cooled down by your saliva. You gross little mutt.'
'Pretty girls huh?'
'Err..' he felt ackward all of a sudden. It was a slip of the tongue and he didn't know what to say to take it back. In fact he didn't feel like taking it back at all.
'Well... looks like its true about pets and owners being alike then,' she giggled.
'Alike?'
'You're both overly friendly,' she grinned.
He laughed ackwardly and avoided looking her in the eye. 'Say, how about we go catch a drink at a cafe nearby. My throat is killing me. And I think Suki could use some water too.'
'Sounds like a nice idea. But I've gotta rush somewhere. I have a date.' she said mournfully.
She petted Suki's head and stood up. 'I'll see you around I guess.'
'Sure. Have fun! It was nice meeting you...' he paused.
'Penelope. Thats my name. And you are?' she asked.
'Pretty name for a pretty girl. I'm Lucas.' he offered his hand to her.
She took it. 'A firm and confident shake,' Lucas thought to himself.
'Alright! I gotta run! I'm running late!' as she started to walk away, Suki decided that she had other plans and ran circles around Penelope. Suki's leash effectively became tangled around Penelope's feet and she tripped.
Lucas took a step foward and caught her neatly.
'Whoa! Sorry about that!'
'Whats a girl gonna do? Both of you are hitting on me at the same time!' she grumbled and he laughed.
'I guess we could do an ice blended since little Suki insists,' she smiled at him.
He looked at her in his arms. 'She smells like Polo for women,' he thought. He didn't realise it but he leaned his face close towards hers.
'Kissing Suki is one thing. But you're gonna have to at least buy me a drink before I kiss you,' she laughed.
'S..sorry... that wasn't what I was thinking.' He lifted her up and helped her back on her feet. 'Lets go get that drink.'
As they walked towards the cafe, he found himself smiling. 'Well I guess walking Suki's not all that bad after all,' he said under his breath.
'Pardon?' she asked.
'I said its a beautiful day for a walk.' he smiled at her as they continued walking.
'You're not bribing me that easily Suki! It'll take more than a few kisses for you to get away with me having to walk you in this weather. I'll probably catch pneumonia and heat stroke on the same day!'
She barked at him and wagged her tail happily.
'I'm being serious. Don't you think I'm kidding young lady. You owe me big time for this walk!' he said petting her head and then leaned to kiss her nose.
'That's cute. You talk to you dog,' a soft voice came.
He raised his head to and found himself staring at a pair of legs that never seemed to end. Slowly he lifted up his head to complete the view. She was beautiful! Baby brown eyes, long brown hair and a smile that bespoke a good sense of humor and mischieviousness. The weather was the last thing on his mind then.
'Doesn't everyone?' he asked.
'I don't know about everyone. But I used to talk to my dog too. Sometime it seems like they speak right back to you!' she said, squatting to take a better look at Suki.
'Yea. Suki defintely understands tho. She listens and does the exact opposite of what you tell her to do. Why did you say used to?'
'Our dog died last summer. She got hit by a car.' she pouted and absently stroked Suki's fur.
'I'm sorry to hear that. Must have been painful. I can't imagine anything happening to this little rascal.' Then he squatted too, and hugged Suki. The thought of losing her had stabbed at him and he felt guilty about complaining that he had to walk her.
'Whats her name?'
'Suki. It means beloved in Japenese. And she's definitely loved in our family,' he smiled.
'She's gorgeous. She's a cocker spaniel right? Tho I've never seen one this color before,' she asked.
'She's mixed, just like her owner. She's a British-American cocket spaniel. She transends culture in her little mind.' Suki decided that she was enjoying the attention and placed her forepaws on the girls arms and reached to lick her face.
'She's friendly.'
'She's normally scared of strangers. She must like you.' He turned Suki's face towards his own. 'Who's a big flirt with pretty girls? Hmm... Suki? You shameless flirt.'
Suki wagged her tail and gave his face a thorough licking. Laughing, he said 'Its hot Suki, but not so hot that I wanna be cooled down by your saliva. You gross little mutt.'
'Pretty girls huh?'
'Err..' he felt ackward all of a sudden. It was a slip of the tongue and he didn't know what to say to take it back. In fact he didn't feel like taking it back at all.
'Well... looks like its true about pets and owners being alike then,' she giggled.
'Alike?'
'You're both overly friendly,' she grinned.
He laughed ackwardly and avoided looking her in the eye. 'Say, how about we go catch a drink at a cafe nearby. My throat is killing me. And I think Suki could use some water too.'
'Sounds like a nice idea. But I've gotta rush somewhere. I have a date.' she said mournfully.
She petted Suki's head and stood up. 'I'll see you around I guess.'
'Sure. Have fun! It was nice meeting you...' he paused.
'Penelope. Thats my name. And you are?' she asked.
'Pretty name for a pretty girl. I'm Lucas.' he offered his hand to her.
She took it. 'A firm and confident shake,' Lucas thought to himself.
'Alright! I gotta run! I'm running late!' as she started to walk away, Suki decided that she had other plans and ran circles around Penelope. Suki's leash effectively became tangled around Penelope's feet and she tripped.
Lucas took a step foward and caught her neatly.
'Whoa! Sorry about that!'
'Whats a girl gonna do? Both of you are hitting on me at the same time!' she grumbled and he laughed.
'I guess we could do an ice blended since little Suki insists,' she smiled at him.
He looked at her in his arms. 'She smells like Polo for women,' he thought. He didn't realise it but he leaned his face close towards hers.
'Kissing Suki is one thing. But you're gonna have to at least buy me a drink before I kiss you,' she laughed.
'S..sorry... that wasn't what I was thinking.' He lifted her up and helped her back on her feet. 'Lets go get that drink.'
As they walked towards the cafe, he found himself smiling. 'Well I guess walking Suki's not all that bad after all,' he said under his breath.
'Pardon?' she asked.
'I said its a beautiful day for a walk.' he smiled at her as they continued walking.
small site update
I added the map thingy which shows you where I'm getting visitors from... or in this case... where I'm NOT getting visitors from (no one reads my blog :(
that was relatively easy thanks to yelena... no brainer stuff.. just click click click... voila it appears...
the @#$#@!!! visitor counter was a MUCH bigger pain in the ass... took me a good 2 hours to figure out how to paste the html to get it to work properly... now its done....
voila! 1 visitor... some how I think the count is gonna be more depressing than impressive...
but who cares... its done...
that was relatively easy thanks to yelena... no brainer stuff.. just click click click... voila it appears...
the @#$#@!!! visitor counter was a MUCH bigger pain in the ass... took me a good 2 hours to figure out how to paste the html to get it to work properly... now its done....
voila! 1 visitor... some how I think the count is gonna be more depressing than impressive...
but who cares... its done...
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Sinderella ella ella IV
Leo DeCrapio: Let's take a look at you sugar! Do me a model like spin!
*CindyFella spins*
Leo DeCrapio: Dear God… that was a TANK model spin!
CindyFella: So I’m big boned! What’s your problem!
Leo DeCrapio: Honey, T-Rex’s are big boned. You’re just bloody fat!
CindyFella: I resent that!
Leo DeCrapio: Resent? Resemble? It’s all the same really!
CindyFella: Okay fine! So my weight could use a little fine tuning.
Leo DeCrapio: Violins need fine tuning. You need a mass salvage, like a rundown fort!
CindyFella: No need to be so heartless!
Leo DeCrapio: If I were heartless I’d tell you that you were so fucking fat, you leek black oil out of your sweat glands. Which is good! At this rate, we’ll be having a huge shortage the stuff for our cars and you’ll definitely be in demand!
CindyFella: Is there anything we can do about this?
Leo DeCrapio: Short of cutting you up and using you as a substitute product for pork meat?
CindyFella: Definitely short of that!
Leo DeCrapio: From now on you’re officially bulimic! It worked for Amy Whinehorse! Everyone feels bad for her! And she looks hot now?
CindyFella: I don’t want to be just skin and bones.
Leo DeCrapio: Honey, the FuhGee’s would stop making bad cover albums the day before you became skin and bones. Robin William would be less hairy than a mammoth! Politicians would take responsibility for global warming. Nicole Itchy would be hot!
CindyFella: Okay… okay… Bulimia is still a disgusting habit. I refuse to do it!
Leo DeCrapio: The only alternative is exercise.
CindyFella: So, I stick my fingers in my throat and puke out what ever I eat right? I can live with that.
Leo DeCrapio: Nah! Scratch that. We need to flog this movie off as a family movie. Can’t have you puking all over the place. Who’ll buy the overpriced popcorn? Besides I have a secret ingredient that will definitely help!
CindyFella: Exercise… *sigh*
Leo DeCrapio: Yes! We’ll start with some chin ups! BRING IT ON BABY!
CindyFella: BRING IT ON BABY!
Leo DeCrapio jumps CindyFella and kisses him
CindyFella: *splutter* I knew that was gonna happen!
Leo is cycling and CindyFella is jogging behind him.
Leo DeCrapio: I don’t know what I’ve been told!
CindyFella: I don’t know what I’ve been told!
Leo DeCrapio: I’m gonna run till I I run out of fat folds!
CindyFella: I’m gonna run till I… WHAT?
Leo is spotting for CindyFella who is shown lifting a bar
Leo DeCrapio: One!
CindyFella: One!
Leo DeCrapio: Two!
CindyFella: Tohhhhh!
Leo DeCrapio: Three!
CindyFella: Thre…. HELP! HELP!
Leo helps lift the bar from CindyFella.
Leo DeCrapio: Good work! Before you know it, we’ll put some weights on that nasty bar!
CindyFella: I want to LOSE weight. Not GAIN weight you stupid fag.
Leo DeCrapio: Haha! Speaking of gaining weight, go take a shower. I’ll prepare dinner for us.
CindyFella: Now you’re talking! I’m starving!
CindyFella goes to take his shower.
Leo DeCrapio: Now for the secret ingredient. Fairy God Papa’s magic potion. Cherry flavored... gotta love virgins!
Leo DeCrapio: Hmm… *reads bottles* ‘Lose a few pounds’, ‘I’m a baby whale,’ ‘Toilet Atom Bomb’. TOILET ATOM BOMB! Sounds about right! Hmm… apply one teaspoon… oh what the hell…
Leo dumps the whole bottle into the cooking pan.
Leo DeCrapio: Bon apetit!
*CindyFella spins*
Leo DeCrapio: Dear God… that was a TANK model spin!
CindyFella: So I’m big boned! What’s your problem!
Leo DeCrapio: Honey, T-Rex’s are big boned. You’re just bloody fat!
CindyFella: I resent that!
Leo DeCrapio: Resent? Resemble? It’s all the same really!
CindyFella: Okay fine! So my weight could use a little fine tuning.
Leo DeCrapio: Violins need fine tuning. You need a mass salvage, like a rundown fort!
CindyFella: No need to be so heartless!
Leo DeCrapio: If I were heartless I’d tell you that you were so fucking fat, you leek black oil out of your sweat glands. Which is good! At this rate, we’ll be having a huge shortage the stuff for our cars and you’ll definitely be in demand!
CindyFella: Is there anything we can do about this?
Leo DeCrapio: Short of cutting you up and using you as a substitute product for pork meat?
CindyFella: Definitely short of that!
Leo DeCrapio: From now on you’re officially bulimic! It worked for Amy Whinehorse! Everyone feels bad for her! And she looks hot now?
CindyFella: I don’t want to be just skin and bones.
Leo DeCrapio: Honey, the FuhGee’s would stop making bad cover albums the day before you became skin and bones. Robin William would be less hairy than a mammoth! Politicians would take responsibility for global warming. Nicole Itchy would be hot!
CindyFella: Okay… okay… Bulimia is still a disgusting habit. I refuse to do it!
Leo DeCrapio: The only alternative is exercise.
CindyFella: So, I stick my fingers in my throat and puke out what ever I eat right? I can live with that.
Leo DeCrapio: Nah! Scratch that. We need to flog this movie off as a family movie. Can’t have you puking all over the place. Who’ll buy the overpriced popcorn? Besides I have a secret ingredient that will definitely help!
CindyFella: Exercise… *sigh*
Leo DeCrapio: Yes! We’ll start with some chin ups! BRING IT ON BABY!
CindyFella: BRING IT ON BABY!
Leo DeCrapio jumps CindyFella and kisses him
CindyFella: *splutter* I knew that was gonna happen!
Leo is cycling and CindyFella is jogging behind him.
Leo DeCrapio: I don’t know what I’ve been told!
CindyFella: I don’t know what I’ve been told!
Leo DeCrapio: I’m gonna run till I I run out of fat folds!
CindyFella: I’m gonna run till I… WHAT?
Leo is spotting for CindyFella who is shown lifting a bar
Leo DeCrapio: One!
CindyFella: One!
Leo DeCrapio: Two!
CindyFella: Tohhhhh!
Leo DeCrapio: Three!
CindyFella: Thre…. HELP! HELP!
Leo helps lift the bar from CindyFella.
Leo DeCrapio: Good work! Before you know it, we’ll put some weights on that nasty bar!
CindyFella: I want to LOSE weight. Not GAIN weight you stupid fag.
Leo DeCrapio: Haha! Speaking of gaining weight, go take a shower. I’ll prepare dinner for us.
CindyFella: Now you’re talking! I’m starving!
CindyFella goes to take his shower.
Leo DeCrapio: Now for the secret ingredient. Fairy God Papa’s magic potion. Cherry flavored... gotta love virgins!
Leo DeCrapio: Hmm… *reads bottles* ‘Lose a few pounds’, ‘I’m a baby whale,’ ‘Toilet Atom Bomb’. TOILET ATOM BOMB! Sounds about right! Hmm… apply one teaspoon… oh what the hell…
Leo dumps the whole bottle into the cooking pan.
Leo DeCrapio: Bon apetit!
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Paris is a country = =;
We went to Wabisabi yesterday to hang out and have a few beers... well.. more than a few... but thats all good ;)
the place itself is pretty classy and the atmosphere is brilliant for chilling out... my only bitch is that the beer is bloody pricy... but I guess you pay for the venue...
the conversation ranged from the serious career stuff to travelling and we finally settled on sex! In fact we talked about sex for a good 2 hours... little Frances had lots of questions to ask Tak, Dennis and myself... and I guess we didn't mind answering her questions as long as there was booze flowing... haha... but its interesting la... sharing experiences with each other... then we get a view on how different people view things...
but the blonde moment of the night definitely belonged to Frances... she asked quite innocently, 'Isn't Wales in Ireland?'... which brought some laughter from us la... then she had to top it off with 'Isn't Paris a country?'... omg... beer + silly comments = non stop laughter for minutes after minutes! I remember her bf, Fang said something like... 'No, it's Paris HILTON!'... even more laughter...
talking with Tak that night was something to think about la... pursuing your own dreams... I always wanted to be a copywriter... now I'm not so sure... I'm having little doubts in my mind whether the work pace and style suit my personality and lifestyle... If I had things my way I would just be a full time script or story writer... and make my money from that... writing has always been my passion... doing it fulltime would be bliss...
maybe I'll have to work first and see how it goes... yeah... I think I will go with that... and see how my book goes with Maya... then make a decision... after all I'm bonded for two years... so yea... we'll see
a little update on the book... I've finished my compilation of poems, stories, musings and scipts... if you want a peek at what I've included... just ask me for a copy on msn :)
work tommorow...
joy... oh.... j.o.y.!
later people!
the place itself is pretty classy and the atmosphere is brilliant for chilling out... my only bitch is that the beer is bloody pricy... but I guess you pay for the venue...
the conversation ranged from the serious career stuff to travelling and we finally settled on sex! In fact we talked about sex for a good 2 hours... little Frances had lots of questions to ask Tak, Dennis and myself... and I guess we didn't mind answering her questions as long as there was booze flowing... haha... but its interesting la... sharing experiences with each other... then we get a view on how different people view things...
but the blonde moment of the night definitely belonged to Frances... she asked quite innocently, 'Isn't Wales in Ireland?'... which brought some laughter from us la... then she had to top it off with 'Isn't Paris a country?'... omg... beer + silly comments = non stop laughter for minutes after minutes! I remember her bf, Fang said something like... 'No, it's Paris HILTON!'... even more laughter...
talking with Tak that night was something to think about la... pursuing your own dreams... I always wanted to be a copywriter... now I'm not so sure... I'm having little doubts in my mind whether the work pace and style suit my personality and lifestyle... If I had things my way I would just be a full time script or story writer... and make my money from that... writing has always been my passion... doing it fulltime would be bliss...
maybe I'll have to work first and see how it goes... yeah... I think I will go with that... and see how my book goes with Maya... then make a decision... after all I'm bonded for two years... so yea... we'll see
a little update on the book... I've finished my compilation of poems, stories, musings and scipts... if you want a peek at what I've included... just ask me for a copy on msn :)
work tommorow...
joy... oh.... j.o.y.!
later people!
Friday, April 18, 2008
Yesterday
Here I am at 5.00 am... still editing my compilation for the book... had a little too much to drink and its making me menacholic...
thinking of the past...
good memories... bad memories...
some how they all seem to melt into one emotion... nostalgia...
but i'm doing fine now... and I will be doing even better in the future...
thinking of the past...
good memories... bad memories...
some how they all seem to melt into one emotion... nostalgia...
but i'm doing fine now... and I will be doing even better in the future...
Thursday, April 17, 2008
I have some big news :)
and for a BIG change... its is GOOD news!
Maya Press is interested in publishing a book with my poetry, stories and plays... Maya Press is probably one of the largest literary publishers in Malaysia... for those of you who haven't heard of it... (not that I blame you...)
so I will be giving them 120 pages of my work from the blog to be made into a book... plays, poems, stories... rantings? Haha...
either way I'm really happy... big chance for me...
I've already started compiling the work...
if there's anyone out there willing to help me go through the stuff I've compiled and help me choose what to put in and what not to.... it would be a big help...
things are looking better :)
I'll update off and on about the book :D
Maya Press is interested in publishing a book with my poetry, stories and plays... Maya Press is probably one of the largest literary publishers in Malaysia... for those of you who haven't heard of it... (not that I blame you...)
so I will be giving them 120 pages of my work from the blog to be made into a book... plays, poems, stories... rantings? Haha...
either way I'm really happy... big chance for me...
I've already started compiling the work...
if there's anyone out there willing to help me go through the stuff I've compiled and help me choose what to put in and what not to.... it would be a big help...
things are looking better :)
I'll update off and on about the book :D
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Sinderella ella ella III
CindyFella: Fairy god father? Do those even exist?
Leo DeCrapio: Of course we do! Just that we’re more undercover than fairy godmothers. And we’re all proper fairies, unlike the female species in our job, if you get what I mean.
CindyFella: I’m CindyFella, whats your name fairy godpapa?
Leo DeCrapio: Leo DeCrapio
CindyFella: So should I call you Crap for short?
Leo DeCrapio: No. What kinda shit name is that? Call me Big Daddy. Or Cum To Papa!
CindyFella : Cum To Papa!
Leo DeCrapio jumps CindyFella and kisses him.
CindyFella: You fucking fag… that’s not what I meant! GET OFF!
Leo DeCrapio : Oh.. my bad!
CindyFella: How about you make yourself more fairy godfather like and help me out here instead of trying to hit on me?
Leo DeCrapio : Okay. So what seems to be the problem?
CindyFella: Theres this girl you see...
Leo DeCrapio : Girl? Sorry. Don't do girls... men yes... boys... when theres no cops around... yes... but girls? What are you? Sick?
CindyFella: Love sick!
CindyFella shows the picture of Sinderella... ella... ella... (yes the booby one :p)
Leo DeCrapio : Okay... now I'M the one thats gonna be sick... who on earth would find THAT sexy!
CindyFella: Anyone with eyes!
Leo DeCrapio : I have eyes...
CindyFella: Ok... anyone with eyes and testosterone...
Leo DeCrapio : Testicles! Now those are a different story! How about I get you a nice partner? I have a picture too! Look!
CindyFella: Fairy papa! That's a man!
Leo DeCrapio: Isn't he now!?
CindyFella: Not my type! Anyway isn't he some sort of footballer?
Leo DeCrapio: Yeap. He's crap at football but amazing with his tongue and hands!
CindyFella: I didn't need to know that...
Leo DeCrapio: There was this one time... in band camp...
CindyFella: I don'....
Leo DeCrapio: I shoved a flute up his ass!
CindyFella: ...'t want to know. Sigh.
Leo DeCrapio: So what do you say boy? Want me to hook you two up? He's really into big boys like you.
CindyFella: THIS is what I want! Either help me or get the hell away from me!
Leo DeCrapio: Okay... okay... not need to get all Queeny on me. You're worse than Elton Johnny after George Michelle sang 'Don't let Elton go down on me.'
CindyFella: It was 'Don't Let the Sun Go Down On Me'.
Leo DeCrapio: See! There you go again! Bitch.. bitch.. bitch....'
CindyFella: So are you helping or NOT?
Leo DeCrapio: Are you sure you don't want a nice spice boy... like Scary Spice?
CindyFella: She's a woman.
Leo DeCrapio: There you go! Just your type!
CindyFella: No. I WANT SINDERELLA-ELLA er.. ELLA!
Leo DeCrapio: Sigh. If thats what you want. Step into my office.
Leo DeCrapio waves his wand and wiggles his ass. A puff of smoke appears.
Coughing
Leo DeCrapio: Welcome to my office!
CindyFella: What the hell! This is a funeral parlour!
Leo DeCrapio: I know. This fairy god father thing doesn't put food on the plate you know?
CindyFella: Why a funeral parlour then?
Leo DeCrapio: Well... Its normally hopeless people like you who give us business in the fairy godhood thingymajic.
CindyFella: Whats that got to do with a funeral parlour?
Leo DeCrapio: Well lately we've not been so hot on the success rate with the whole fairy godhood thingy. Some of them committed suicide.
CindyFella: What? Some?
Leo DeCrapio: Okay okay... most of them?
CindyFella: I'm doomed!
Leo DeCrapio: Cheer up! I'm sure your happy ending will be perfect! Now lets get to work!
Leo DeCrapio: Of course we do! Just that we’re more undercover than fairy godmothers. And we’re all proper fairies, unlike the female species in our job, if you get what I mean.
CindyFella: I’m CindyFella, whats your name fairy godpapa?
Leo DeCrapio: Leo DeCrapio
CindyFella: So should I call you Crap for short?
Leo DeCrapio: No. What kinda shit name is that? Call me Big Daddy. Or Cum To Papa!
CindyFella : Cum To Papa!
Leo DeCrapio jumps CindyFella and kisses him.
CindyFella: You fucking fag… that’s not what I meant! GET OFF!
Leo DeCrapio : Oh.. my bad!
CindyFella: How about you make yourself more fairy godfather like and help me out here instead of trying to hit on me?
Leo DeCrapio : Okay. So what seems to be the problem?
CindyFella: Theres this girl you see...
Leo DeCrapio : Girl? Sorry. Don't do girls... men yes... boys... when theres no cops around... yes... but girls? What are you? Sick?
CindyFella: Love sick!
CindyFella shows the picture of Sinderella... ella... ella... (yes the booby one :p)
Leo DeCrapio : Okay... now I'M the one thats gonna be sick... who on earth would find THAT sexy!
CindyFella: Anyone with eyes!
Leo DeCrapio : I have eyes...
CindyFella: Ok... anyone with eyes and testosterone...
Leo DeCrapio : Testicles! Now those are a different story! How about I get you a nice partner? I have a picture too! Look!
CindyFella: Fairy papa! That's a man!Leo DeCrapio: Isn't he now!?
CindyFella: Not my type! Anyway isn't he some sort of footballer?
Leo DeCrapio: Yeap. He's crap at football but amazing with his tongue and hands!
CindyFella: I didn't need to know that...
Leo DeCrapio: There was this one time... in band camp...
CindyFella: I don'....
Leo DeCrapio: I shoved a flute up his ass!
CindyFella: ...'t want to know. Sigh.
Leo DeCrapio: So what do you say boy? Want me to hook you two up? He's really into big boys like you.
CindyFella: THIS is what I want! Either help me or get the hell away from me!
Leo DeCrapio: Okay... okay... not need to get all Queeny on me. You're worse than Elton Johnny after George Michelle sang 'Don't let Elton go down on me.'
CindyFella: It was 'Don't Let the Sun Go Down On Me'.
Leo DeCrapio: See! There you go again! Bitch.. bitch.. bitch....'
CindyFella: So are you helping or NOT?
Leo DeCrapio: Are you sure you don't want a nice spice boy... like Scary Spice?
CindyFella: She's a woman.
Leo DeCrapio: There you go! Just your type!
CindyFella: No. I WANT SINDERELLA-ELLA er.. ELLA!
Leo DeCrapio: Sigh. If thats what you want. Step into my office.
Leo DeCrapio waves his wand and wiggles his ass. A puff of smoke appears.
Coughing
Leo DeCrapio: Welcome to my office!
CindyFella: What the hell! This is a funeral parlour!
Leo DeCrapio: I know. This fairy god father thing doesn't put food on the plate you know?
CindyFella: Why a funeral parlour then?
Leo DeCrapio: Well... Its normally hopeless people like you who give us business in the fairy godhood thingymajic.
CindyFella: Whats that got to do with a funeral parlour?
Leo DeCrapio: Well lately we've not been so hot on the success rate with the whole fairy godhood thingy. Some of them committed suicide.
CindyFella: What? Some?
Leo DeCrapio: Okay okay... most of them?
CindyFella: I'm doomed!
Leo DeCrapio: Cheer up! I'm sure your happy ending will be perfect! Now lets get to work!
Monday, April 14, 2008
Sinderella ella ella II
Newspapers flies in to CindyFella's face
CindyFella: Hmm... whats this? Oh my god! Who is this babe!
Oh Bra Winfley: What babe, fairy godson?
CindyFella: THIS babe! Sinderella-ella-ella!
Oh Bra Winfley: Thats no babe! Thats an ungrateful bitch! I gave her a happily ever after and she dumped me like a lump of hot coal! Just because I told her husband she used to sell herself in Jalan Alor.
CindyFella: How could you, fairy god mama. What did he say?
Oh Bra Winfley: The idiot said at least he was saving 50 bucks every night and married her any way.
CindyFella: She's too beautiful to have done something so wrong! I don't believe you fairy god mama. I think I'm in love!
Oh Bra Winfley: Look. I've seen this crap on my talk shows all the fucking time. Boy sees girl on newspaper. Boy falls for girl. Girl asks for webcam sex. Girl tapes it and blackmails boy. Boy kills himself. You're being stupid!
CindyFella: She's not like other girls fairy god mama. I can tell from the picture!
CindyFella: Hmm... whats this? Oh my god! Who is this babe!
Oh Bra Winfley: What babe, fairy godson?
CindyFella: THIS babe! Sinderella-ella-ella!
Oh Bra Winfley: Thats no babe! Thats an ungrateful bitch! I gave her a happily ever after and she dumped me like a lump of hot coal! Just because I told her husband she used to sell herself in Jalan Alor.
CindyFella: How could you, fairy god mama. What did he say?
Oh Bra Winfley: The idiot said at least he was saving 50 bucks every night and married her any way.
CindyFella: She's too beautiful to have done something so wrong! I don't believe you fairy god mama. I think I'm in love!
Oh Bra Winfley: Look. I've seen this crap on my talk shows all the fucking time. Boy sees girl on newspaper. Boy falls for girl. Girl asks for webcam sex. Girl tapes it and blackmails boy. Boy kills himself. You're being stupid!
CindyFella: She's not like other girls fairy god mama. I can tell from the picture!
Oh Bra Winfley: You idiot! Thats just a shot of her cleavage. You don't even know what her face looks like!
CindyFella: Yes but what a valley! I could drown in those!
Oh Bra Winfley: Of course you could. She's a double DD. I helped her get those made by the same guy who did Peter Anre's abs. Grope her too hard and she'll have three tits instead of two. That's what you get for mop, a pumpkin and two mice for a boob job!
CindyFella: I don't care god mama. I want to try to marry her. It says theres going to be a ball to find her next husband. Help me get in shape for it!
Oh Bra Winfley: I might own 3/4's of America and be able to sell sugar to diabetic Americans who love me, but get you into shape? In a week? Hell, even a dozen bulldozers couldn't ram you into shape.
CindyFella: Use your magic wand! You can turn me into a gorgeous hunk with a wave of your hand?
Oh Bra Winfley: Honey, if that worked, do you think I'd be an ugly, fat ass, black American woman? Do you think I'd honestly spend my days listening to problems from head case Americans? Head cases amongst Americans! Have you any idea how crazy you have to be to be considered a headcase by an American. No... no way that will work.
CindyFella: She's the one for me god mama. I want her. I can feel it in my bones!
Oh Bra Winfley: More like your boner. Just like a man. Flash a bit of titty and the little head takes over the big head. I'll tell you this young man. If you go for her. It's over between you and I. I'm done supporting your fat ass. I'll dump you so fast you won't be able to finish a cheese burger!
CindyFella: Don't make me choose fairy god mama. Please! Thats not fair!
Oh Bra Winfley: I'll take away all your food!
CindyFella: You WOULDN'T!
Oh Bra Winfley : Oh yes sir! I definitely would! Lets see how you afford 20 big facks for breakfast, 40 for lunch and 80 for dinner!
CindyFella: You can't. Mc Gonads would dump their sponsorship of your show!
Oh Bra Winfley : To hell with the show! I'm done with listening to people whine about their lives!
CindyFella: I'm sorry god mama. I've made up my mind.
CindyFella: I'm sorry god mama. I've made up my mind.
Oh Bra Winfley: You will regret this you fat bastard!
Oh Bra Winfley waves her wand and a huge puff of smoke appears
Sounds of coughing
CindyFella: You didn't leave! You love me too much for that after all!
Oh Bra Winfley: Fucking Spill Beerg is gonna hear it from me for this shitty special effects.
Oh Bra Winfley storms out of the house.
CindyFella: Oh no! What ever will I do?
CindyFella: Oh no! I'm in such a fix! Who ever will help me?
CindyFella: Oh woe is me! Is this the end?
CindyFella: OI! YOU FUCKING FAG THATS YOUR CUE TO COME IN!
Leo DeCrapio: Sorry! Sorry! I was busy blowin... er talking to some one.. I had my mout... err... hands full.
CindyFella: Oh my! Who could you be?
Leo DeCrapio: I'm your fairy god father of course! Does the pink skirt go with my eyes?
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Sinderella ella ella
heh.. since I've been accused of being redundant... I thought I'd post another script of mine in the works... definitely different from Strawberry Milkshake :)
enjoy!
_____________________________________________________________________
New Paper showing Headlines
SinDerella smashes glass heel into Charming’s ear after argument!
SinDerella: Oh my God! How dare these bloody journalists blow everything out of proportion? All I did was tap him on the head with my heels! How dare they say I killed my poor hubby!
Britney Shaves: How is that possible Sindy? Your heel smashed straight through poor Charmy’s skull!
SinDerella: Shut up hairball. I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here.
Britney Shaves: You know I hate it when you call me that, Sindy!
SinDerella: Ok! Punziel then!
Britney Shaves: I hate that too! Not that long haired freak I used to be! Call me by my new name, Britney Shaves, damn it!
SinDerella: Whatever! At least you were useful back then. You used to clean my room by just walking around.
Britney Shaves: Emo!
SinDerella: Skinhead!
Britney Shaves: Emo!
SinDerella: Skinhead!
*fades out with them calling each other names*
Ext Garden
Sound of kids running around and screaming.
SinDerella: DAMN MY OVARIES! 18 kids in two years? I must be some freak or something!
Dougie Howsit: Well actually I can explain it to you if you want.
SinDerella: Shut up! I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here!
Dougie Howsit: That’s when a woman who is unable to naturally have children injects a group of drugs over an eight- to 10-day period so her ovaries can produce several mature eggs during a menstrual cycle. Therefore…
SinDerella: Shut up Dougie Howsit. I wasn’t barren. Charmy just couldn’t get it up! So we had no choice. But 18 babies in two years? What am I some kind of baby fucking factory? This is your fault!
Dougie Howsit: You remind me everyday and make me baby sit for free. What else do you want from me?
SinDerella: I want you to get rid of the brats. And I want a new husband. I haven’t gotten laid in weeks and its making me cranky.
Dougie Howsit: A cranky emo… is a normal emo!
SinDerella punches Dougie Howsit
SinDerella: Just do it! Or I’ll sue you for malpractice you squeaky voiced little pip squeak!
Dougie Howsit: Sell your children? But you’ll just use it to feed your alcoholism and cocaine abuse! As your personal doctor I seriously think…
SinDerella: DO IT! BEFORE I BREAK YOUR FUCKING VOICE WITH MY REMAINING GLASS SLIPPER!
Dougie Howsit: *squeak* Okay.
Ext. Warehouse
SinDerella: You sure this dude’s gonna buy my kids?
Dougie Howsit: Yea! They don’t call him the Big Bad Wolf for nothing.
SinDerella: Good!
Dougie Howsit: Aren’t you worried he’s going to eat them?
SinDerella: God damn it. I have my own fucking problems. Why the hell should I worry about some over grown brats.
Big Bad Wolf: Hello. I’ll huff, and I’ll puff and I’ll blow you.
SinDerella: He’s talking to you Dougie.
Dougie Howsit: I’m only 15… its not legal I’m afraid… according to the Law of…
Big Bad Wolf : Bah… Jail bait… no wonder you sound like a woman
SinDerella: You don’t look so bad to me. You’re a short yellow Chinese man. How can you be the big bad wolf?
Big Bad Wolf: Haiyah… its just a nickname la. I’m the biggest triad in town. People FEAR me!
SinDerella: I hate fucking triads.
Big Bad Wolf: I hate emo goth bitches. So we’re even.
SinDerella: Anyway I brought you some pork. So don’t eat my kids when I sell them to you?
Big Bad Wolf: PORK? NO PORK! I’m Muslim!
SinDerella & Dougie Howsit: Muslim??
Big Bad Wolf: Of course la! How do you think I own all these child labour based factories!
SinDerella: So it’s just child labour huh? Well I’ve had a tougher life. These little bastards will survive. So give me the money!
Mysterious voice: Ouhhhh! Wait! I’ll buy your kids from you!
SinDerella: Oh my god! Its Michelle Jerkson.
Michelle Jerkson: They’ll live a wonderful life and never grow up in my Never Never Land. Cause I’m BAD!
Big Bad Wolf: I’m THE BAD ONE HERE! Your kids’ll also go through a carton of lube every month!
Michelle Jerkson: I resent that! I don’t use lube. I like it natural!
Big Bad Wolf: Just like your face? I think your nose is dropping off again!
Michelle Jerkson: Are you picking a fight Chinaman?
Big Bad Wolf: Better a Chinaman than a ying yang plastic androgynous screw up!
Michelle Jerkson: THAT’S IT! TAKE THIS!
Michelle Jerkson throws his hat at Big Bad Wolf and cuts the Big Bad Wolf’s shirt.
Big Bad Wolf: That’s nothing! You and your stupid cap!
Big Bad Wolf bites Michelle Jerkson’s arm
Big Bad Wolf: Damn it! I can’t tell if its WHITE meat or BLACK meat, but… it definitely tastes like freaking PLASTIC!
Michelle Jerkson: What the hell is that supposed to mean? You’re really asking for it now.
Michelle Jerkson takes off his glove and Freddy Kruger like claws come out. He slashes at the Big Bad Wolf.
Big Bad Wolf: What the hell? How did you steal those from Cougar?
Michelle Jerkson: I knew him since he was a kid. So he lent them to me.
Big Bad Wolf: No wonder he turned out to be such a sick screw up! He still walks like a cowboy too! Take this! Grandma’s Specialty!
Big Bad Wolf throws a pair of giant dentures at Michelle Jerkson that bite his arm.
Michelle Jerkson: Ouhhh!! I mean… OW!!!!!!
SinDerella: I HATE ACTION MOVIES. They’re just like life… meaningless!
SinDerella Takes out an M16 and shoots both of them!
Dougie Howsit: Oh my god! You shot both of them!!
SinDerella: Well what are you waiting for, take the money and let’s go home. I’m RICH NOW!
Dougie Howsit: Shouldn’t we call an ambulance?
SinDerella: SHUT UP! I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here!
Dougie Howsit: What about the kids?
SinDerella: What about them? I have my own problems. Don’t dump all your troubles on me! Shut up and let’s go.
The two walk away with two silver suitcases of money.
Ext Garden
SinDerella: The damn kids found their way home! STRESS!
Britney Shaves: I’ll sing them a song and calm them down.
Britney Shaves sings ‘hit me baby one more time’ and the kids beat the crap out of her.
SinDerella: They finally did something useful With this money I’ll just send them all off to boarding school! YES that’s a BRILLIANT idea!
Britney Shaves: Call an ambulance!!!
SinDerella: SHUT UP! I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here!
Int Living Room
SinDerella: Finally peace and quiet! The brats are gone!
Maximum: Yes madam. It is a triffle quiet without the little ones.
SinDerella: That’s an understatement Jenkins.
Maximum: I AM MAXIMUM MERIDAS, GENERAL OF THE FERRET REGIMENT OF THE RODENT ARMY AND SERVANT TO THE EMPEROR RATATOUILLE! I AM FATHER TO A MURDERED HAMSTER AND HUSBAND TO TWO MURDERED GERBILS AND LANDLORD TO AN ANTI RODENT WORLD – AND I WILL HAVE VENGEANCE!
SinDerella: Shut the fuck up! All butlers are called Jenkins. And you’re no different!
Maximum: But, but…
SinDerella: I’ll cut your cheese rations if you don’t shut up!
Maximum: Yes ma’am. Jenkins it is.
SinDerella: Any way I have to make a plan to find my new husband!
Maximum: I know ma’am, why don’t we throw a ball like Prince Charming did to find your new husband.
SinDerella: I know! I should throw a ball like Prince Charming did to find my new husband! I’m a genius!
Maximum: But ma’am, that was MY idea!
SinDerella: SHUT UP! I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here.
=
enjoy!
_____________________________________________________________________
New Paper showing Headlines
SinDerella smashes glass heel into Charming’s ear after argument!
SinDerella: Oh my God! How dare these bloody journalists blow everything out of proportion? All I did was tap him on the head with my heels! How dare they say I killed my poor hubby!
Britney Shaves: How is that possible Sindy? Your heel smashed straight through poor Charmy’s skull!
SinDerella: Shut up hairball. I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here.
Britney Shaves: You know I hate it when you call me that, Sindy!
SinDerella: Ok! Punziel then!
Britney Shaves: I hate that too! Not that long haired freak I used to be! Call me by my new name, Britney Shaves, damn it!
SinDerella: Whatever! At least you were useful back then. You used to clean my room by just walking around.
Britney Shaves: Emo!
SinDerella: Skinhead!
Britney Shaves: Emo!
SinDerella: Skinhead!
*fades out with them calling each other names*
Ext Garden
Sound of kids running around and screaming.
SinDerella: DAMN MY OVARIES! 18 kids in two years? I must be some freak or something!
Dougie Howsit: Well actually I can explain it to you if you want.
SinDerella: Shut up! I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here!
Dougie Howsit: That’s when a woman who is unable to naturally have children injects a group of drugs over an eight- to 10-day period so her ovaries can produce several mature eggs during a menstrual cycle. Therefore…
SinDerella: Shut up Dougie Howsit. I wasn’t barren. Charmy just couldn’t get it up! So we had no choice. But 18 babies in two years? What am I some kind of baby fucking factory? This is your fault!
Dougie Howsit: You remind me everyday and make me baby sit for free. What else do you want from me?
SinDerella: I want you to get rid of the brats. And I want a new husband. I haven’t gotten laid in weeks and its making me cranky.
Dougie Howsit: A cranky emo… is a normal emo!
SinDerella punches Dougie Howsit
SinDerella: Just do it! Or I’ll sue you for malpractice you squeaky voiced little pip squeak!
Dougie Howsit: Sell your children? But you’ll just use it to feed your alcoholism and cocaine abuse! As your personal doctor I seriously think…
SinDerella: DO IT! BEFORE I BREAK YOUR FUCKING VOICE WITH MY REMAINING GLASS SLIPPER!
Dougie Howsit: *squeak* Okay.
Ext. Warehouse
SinDerella: You sure this dude’s gonna buy my kids?
Dougie Howsit: Yea! They don’t call him the Big Bad Wolf for nothing.
SinDerella: Good!
Dougie Howsit: Aren’t you worried he’s going to eat them?
SinDerella: God damn it. I have my own fucking problems. Why the hell should I worry about some over grown brats.
Big Bad Wolf: Hello. I’ll huff, and I’ll puff and I’ll blow you.
SinDerella: He’s talking to you Dougie.
Dougie Howsit: I’m only 15… its not legal I’m afraid… according to the Law of…
Big Bad Wolf : Bah… Jail bait… no wonder you sound like a woman
SinDerella: You don’t look so bad to me. You’re a short yellow Chinese man. How can you be the big bad wolf?
Big Bad Wolf: Haiyah… its just a nickname la. I’m the biggest triad in town. People FEAR me!
SinDerella: I hate fucking triads.
Big Bad Wolf: I hate emo goth bitches. So we’re even.
SinDerella: Anyway I brought you some pork. So don’t eat my kids when I sell them to you?
Big Bad Wolf: PORK? NO PORK! I’m Muslim!
SinDerella & Dougie Howsit: Muslim??
Big Bad Wolf: Of course la! How do you think I own all these child labour based factories!
SinDerella: So it’s just child labour huh? Well I’ve had a tougher life. These little bastards will survive. So give me the money!
Mysterious voice: Ouhhhh! Wait! I’ll buy your kids from you!
SinDerella: Oh my god! Its Michelle Jerkson.
Michelle Jerkson: They’ll live a wonderful life and never grow up in my Never Never Land. Cause I’m BAD!
Big Bad Wolf: I’m THE BAD ONE HERE! Your kids’ll also go through a carton of lube every month!
Michelle Jerkson: I resent that! I don’t use lube. I like it natural!
Big Bad Wolf: Just like your face? I think your nose is dropping off again!
Michelle Jerkson: Are you picking a fight Chinaman?
Big Bad Wolf: Better a Chinaman than a ying yang plastic androgynous screw up!
Michelle Jerkson: THAT’S IT! TAKE THIS!
Michelle Jerkson throws his hat at Big Bad Wolf and cuts the Big Bad Wolf’s shirt.
Big Bad Wolf: That’s nothing! You and your stupid cap!
Big Bad Wolf bites Michelle Jerkson’s arm
Big Bad Wolf: Damn it! I can’t tell if its WHITE meat or BLACK meat, but… it definitely tastes like freaking PLASTIC!
Michelle Jerkson: What the hell is that supposed to mean? You’re really asking for it now.
Michelle Jerkson takes off his glove and Freddy Kruger like claws come out. He slashes at the Big Bad Wolf.
Big Bad Wolf: What the hell? How did you steal those from Cougar?
Michelle Jerkson: I knew him since he was a kid. So he lent them to me.
Big Bad Wolf: No wonder he turned out to be such a sick screw up! He still walks like a cowboy too! Take this! Grandma’s Specialty!
Big Bad Wolf throws a pair of giant dentures at Michelle Jerkson that bite his arm.
Michelle Jerkson: Ouhhh!! I mean… OW!!!!!!
SinDerella: I HATE ACTION MOVIES. They’re just like life… meaningless!
SinDerella Takes out an M16 and shoots both of them!
Dougie Howsit: Oh my god! You shot both of them!!
SinDerella: Well what are you waiting for, take the money and let’s go home. I’m RICH NOW!
Dougie Howsit: Shouldn’t we call an ambulance?
SinDerella: SHUT UP! I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here!
Dougie Howsit: What about the kids?
SinDerella: What about them? I have my own problems. Don’t dump all your troubles on me! Shut up and let’s go.
The two walk away with two silver suitcases of money.
Ext Garden
SinDerella: The damn kids found their way home! STRESS!
Britney Shaves: I’ll sing them a song and calm them down.
Britney Shaves sings ‘hit me baby one more time’ and the kids beat the crap out of her.
SinDerella: They finally did something useful With this money I’ll just send them all off to boarding school! YES that’s a BRILLIANT idea!
Britney Shaves: Call an ambulance!!!
SinDerella: SHUT UP! I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here!
Int Living Room
SinDerella: Finally peace and quiet! The brats are gone!
Maximum: Yes madam. It is a triffle quiet without the little ones.
SinDerella: That’s an understatement Jenkins.
Maximum: I AM MAXIMUM MERIDAS, GENERAL OF THE FERRET REGIMENT OF THE RODENT ARMY AND SERVANT TO THE EMPEROR RATATOUILLE! I AM FATHER TO A MURDERED HAMSTER AND HUSBAND TO TWO MURDERED GERBILS AND LANDLORD TO AN ANTI RODENT WORLD – AND I WILL HAVE VENGEANCE!
SinDerella: Shut the fuck up! All butlers are called Jenkins. And you’re no different!
Maximum: But, but…
SinDerella: I’ll cut your cheese rations if you don’t shut up!
Maximum: Yes ma’am. Jenkins it is.
SinDerella: Any way I have to make a plan to find my new husband!
Maximum: I know ma’am, why don’t we throw a ball like Prince Charming did to find your new husband.
SinDerella: I know! I should throw a ball like Prince Charming did to find my new husband! I’m a genius!
Maximum: But ma’am, that was MY idea!
SinDerella: SHUT UP! I’m trying to have a deep emotional moment here.
=
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
Vanilla Kisses Chapter 1
It wasn't much of a football match. They were losing badly. One of the players had injured been injured by a rough tackle from the opponents. He smiled to himself. 'This is where I shine!' he grinned to himself.He took the free kick quickly, running the ball forward into open space. As he ran, he kept his eyes open, looking for an open player. There were none.
'I'll take it myself then,' he thought.
He baited the defender, teasing him with a look at the ball then pulled it deftly behind his dribbling leg. Then he kicked it forward, leaving the off balanced defender with a mistimed tackle and himself with yards of space. There was nothing between him but the keeper and himself.
'Go A levels!,' he heard some one shout. He risked a quick glance, to see who it was. His jaw dropped a little. She was something to look at. Short jet black hair that fell to her shoulders. And a short flowery blue skirt.
'Gosh, what a short skirt!' he thought looking appreciatively at her legs.
'You IDIOT! What are you doing! Run for goal,' some one hissed.
His mind snapped back to the football game. He had stopped running to look at her and defenders were gaining ground on him quickly. He raced forward and dribbled.He pushed the ball to his best foot and prepared to shoot.
'Go A levels!' said the voice again. Distracted he looked up. And miskicked it horribly. To his suprised he barely missed. The corner flag that is.There was a groan from the A level's crowd.
'Even a blind man could have shot better than that! What were you doing you idiot,' said his new friend Kenny.'Sorry! I got distracted! We'll get the next ball!' he replied. He looked up again for the girl. But she wasn't there anymore. He sighed.
It began to drizzle slightly. They were 3 – 0 down. ‘Three goals,’ he thought to himself. ‘This should be fun!’ he grinned. ‘We’ll start with this ball!’ he shouted to his teammates and ran towards the opposing defender with the ball. Watching his opponent’s hips carefully, he predicted the side step and tackled him neatly.
Not watching his opponent stumble awkwardly after the tackle, he began running towards goal again, he heard Kenny call his name, ‘Jason! Cross it!’ Slowing down his full strides, he nudged the ball onto his best foot and stroked it on the sweet spot. The ball traveled swiftly and true to its aim, straight into the path of Kenny’s run towards goal. Kenny chested it neatly and volleyed it on his second touch, right into the back of the net.
‘That’s the way it should be mate!’ Jason screamed, running in joy towards his teammates.
Then it began pouring.
Soaked from head to toe, he lit a cigarette up and began taking deep drags. His breathing was heavy and his lower torso was covered with mud.
‘Man, I thought you were good. Dribbling like a mad man past a few defenders and then that assist after a great tackle. But that was it! You moved like a dying slug after that!’ said Kenny.
‘Dude! Give me a break. Its been months since I’ve had any exercise!’ Jason said exasperatedly.
‘The cigarettes aren’t doing you any good either!’ Kenny laughed.
‘Shut up. I know you want one. Just ask, instead of bitching at me,’ Jason grinned, passing him a cigarette. ‘Anyway, did you see that chick? The one who was cheering for us?’ he asked.
‘We had chicks cheering for us? I didn’t see anything,’ Kenny replied, lighting up.
‘Too busy checking out the guys eh?’ he teased and avoided a sweeping kick from Kenny. ‘Man, I’m too tired to play footsie with you. Give it a rest.’ Jason complained.
‘Well you have half an hour to get ready for your birthday party. Can’t have the birthday boy looking like a mud pie now can we?’ Kenny chuckled.
‘Crap. It’s that late already? I need a change of clothes and a shower!’ Jason groaned.
‘Lucky for you, my house is right down the road. You can take a shower there. But as for clothes… well I guess I could find something that fits you,’ Kenny grinned impishly.
‘I don’t like that look on your face mate. You’re up to something. I can feel it!’
‘What the fuck dude! What kind of get up is this?’ Jason demanded. ‘Oversized pink shorts and a body hugging purple T-shirt? Are you trying to all the fags in town to hit on me or something?’
Kenny laughed for a good five minutes before admitting, ‘Yea, something like that! Besides, it your fault we lost 5 – 1. If you had just lasted the full 90 minutes instead of 15 minutes, we’d have won. Think of it as a birthday present! Let’s go bro. We’re gonna be late!’
Jason grumbled and whined all the way to Subang Parade about the clothes and it just sent Kenny into bigger spurts of laughter.
'I'll take it myself then,' he thought.
He baited the defender, teasing him with a look at the ball then pulled it deftly behind his dribbling leg. Then he kicked it forward, leaving the off balanced defender with a mistimed tackle and himself with yards of space. There was nothing between him but the keeper and himself.
'Go A levels!,' he heard some one shout. He risked a quick glance, to see who it was. His jaw dropped a little. She was something to look at. Short jet black hair that fell to her shoulders. And a short flowery blue skirt.
'Gosh, what a short skirt!' he thought looking appreciatively at her legs.
'You IDIOT! What are you doing! Run for goal,' some one hissed.
His mind snapped back to the football game. He had stopped running to look at her and defenders were gaining ground on him quickly. He raced forward and dribbled.He pushed the ball to his best foot and prepared to shoot.
'Go A levels!' said the voice again. Distracted he looked up. And miskicked it horribly. To his suprised he barely missed. The corner flag that is.There was a groan from the A level's crowd.
'Even a blind man could have shot better than that! What were you doing you idiot,' said his new friend Kenny.'Sorry! I got distracted! We'll get the next ball!' he replied. He looked up again for the girl. But she wasn't there anymore. He sighed.
It began to drizzle slightly. They were 3 – 0 down. ‘Three goals,’ he thought to himself. ‘This should be fun!’ he grinned. ‘We’ll start with this ball!’ he shouted to his teammates and ran towards the opposing defender with the ball. Watching his opponent’s hips carefully, he predicted the side step and tackled him neatly.
Not watching his opponent stumble awkwardly after the tackle, he began running towards goal again, he heard Kenny call his name, ‘Jason! Cross it!’ Slowing down his full strides, he nudged the ball onto his best foot and stroked it on the sweet spot. The ball traveled swiftly and true to its aim, straight into the path of Kenny’s run towards goal. Kenny chested it neatly and volleyed it on his second touch, right into the back of the net.
‘That’s the way it should be mate!’ Jason screamed, running in joy towards his teammates.
Then it began pouring.
Soaked from head to toe, he lit a cigarette up and began taking deep drags. His breathing was heavy and his lower torso was covered with mud.
‘Man, I thought you were good. Dribbling like a mad man past a few defenders and then that assist after a great tackle. But that was it! You moved like a dying slug after that!’ said Kenny.
‘Dude! Give me a break. Its been months since I’ve had any exercise!’ Jason said exasperatedly.
‘The cigarettes aren’t doing you any good either!’ Kenny laughed.
‘Shut up. I know you want one. Just ask, instead of bitching at me,’ Jason grinned, passing him a cigarette. ‘Anyway, did you see that chick? The one who was cheering for us?’ he asked.
‘We had chicks cheering for us? I didn’t see anything,’ Kenny replied, lighting up.
‘Too busy checking out the guys eh?’ he teased and avoided a sweeping kick from Kenny. ‘Man, I’m too tired to play footsie with you. Give it a rest.’ Jason complained.
‘Well you have half an hour to get ready for your birthday party. Can’t have the birthday boy looking like a mud pie now can we?’ Kenny chuckled.
‘Crap. It’s that late already? I need a change of clothes and a shower!’ Jason groaned.
‘Lucky for you, my house is right down the road. You can take a shower there. But as for clothes… well I guess I could find something that fits you,’ Kenny grinned impishly.
‘I don’t like that look on your face mate. You’re up to something. I can feel it!’
‘What the fuck dude! What kind of get up is this?’ Jason demanded. ‘Oversized pink shorts and a body hugging purple T-shirt? Are you trying to all the fags in town to hit on me or something?’
Kenny laughed for a good five minutes before admitting, ‘Yea, something like that! Besides, it your fault we lost 5 – 1. If you had just lasted the full 90 minutes instead of 15 minutes, we’d have won. Think of it as a birthday present! Let’s go bro. We’re gonna be late!’
Jason grumbled and whined all the way to Subang Parade about the clothes and it just sent Kenny into bigger spurts of laughter.
Monday, April 07, 2008
He's not dead
He’s just sleeping
Laying there
A little pale, a little white
Just exhaustion from last night
His eyes half open
Staring into nothingness
Glazed and empty
Let him rest, let him be
His skin’s cold to the touch
The slightest sheen of sweat
Maybe he’s falling ill
But why is his body oh so still
His hands still clasping
Holding tightly
The bottles of pills
He’s resting, he’s ill
He’s not breathing
He’s turning blue
But it will pass
It won’t last
He’s not broken
He hasn’t given up
He’s not dead
He’s just resting on his bed
He wouldn’t leave us
Those who love him
He is strong
He can’t die, its just wrong
Why did he leave
Why did he go
He’s just sleeping
I’m his mother… I know
Laying there
A little pale, a little white
Just exhaustion from last night
His eyes half open
Staring into nothingness
Glazed and empty
Let him rest, let him be
His skin’s cold to the touch
The slightest sheen of sweat
Maybe he’s falling ill
But why is his body oh so still
His hands still clasping
Holding tightly
The bottles of pills
He’s resting, he’s ill
He’s not breathing
He’s turning blue
But it will pass
It won’t last
He’s not broken
He hasn’t given up
He’s not dead
He’s just resting on his bed
He wouldn’t leave us
Those who love him
He is strong
He can’t die, its just wrong
Why did he leave
Why did he go
He’s just sleeping
I’m his mother… I know
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
