Multi Lingual Computer People

What on earth is wrong with you computer people??? Just look at this list from the top of my head:

1. Java

2. Java script

3. perl

4. SGM

5. XHTML

6. UDP

7. TCP

8. IP

9. HTML

ARGGHHH ANY MORE of these initials and I will GO INSANE.. WHATS WRONG WITH U COMPUTER PEOPLE??? Make one language and stick to it damnit. My ppoooorrrrr brain so much space is gonna be wasted for this crap that I will never use again...

Seriously. So many languages. Can't some genius just standardise everything in some great giant Programming for Super Dummies book or something. Just looking at the names let alone finding out what some of these things function for gives me a stupendous head ache.

I can hear some of you saying 'Hey its not so bad! Come here and I'll explain to you what they mean.'

BEGONE! GO! GO! AWAY WITH THOU!

I seriously refuse to learn multiple languages to converse with a piece of hardware or software even. Thats just PLAIN SAD. When some one asks, 'So how many languages do you speak' Do you computer people snort and giggle while answering '16.. Pearl, XHMTL, Java... etc (insert more computechtalk here)'. The poor bloke would probably shake his head and this this techie needs to be disected from his computer.

If its not bad enough that there are three zillion languages that us non techie people have to figure out. Imagine my frustration when I hear conversations like this :

'So what OS are you running?'

'Me? I run a winblow and a linsux.'

'Wahh! both OS'es ar!' (please insert cyber orgasm here)

I find out OS means operating system. Fair enough more tech talk. Winblow and Linsux? If were're not confused enough, they decided to give their own little pet names to the OS'es. Winblows is windows and Linsux is Linux. Where do you draw the line? How many headaches will you visit upon us non techies???

Computers are complicated creatures, I hear you drool. But aren't humans as well? How many languages do 'WE' speak? Definately not 1 million and three hundred and fifty six!

So I say

'STANDARDISE!' STANDARDISE!'

And save a non techie some brain space and short term memory. Heaven forbid it goes into your long term memory. *shudder*