Strength in numbers?

A familiar saying is it not. There is safety in numbers. The strenght of the wolf is the pack and thes strength of the pack is the wolf.

But the wolf by nature is a loner. Some times he forgets that. But nature never allows him to forget it for too long.

Commuter... can eat?

The answer is... CAN! Damnit no digi cam! Must remember to bug Audrey to lend me hers...

Well the fact is... if you go to the subang parade stop in the morning, you will see hawker shops outside and inside the place. There are even places for you to sit and enjoy your meal. Most of them are take away shops tho.

Is the food good? Do I look like I want yet ANOTHER bout of food poisoning? Call me snobbish, but I don't trust these guys! God knows how old they food is, and how clean they are about preparing their food!

Any ways thats besides the point. My meaning of commuter can eat... is slightly different. I mean that commuter can pakai? As in, is it of any good?

I've not been to the commuter station in 11 years no less. 11 years is a LONG time. Surely there has been SOME progress in the past eleven years. First impression of the station. It has progressed! Progressed into disrepair! The place looked even shadier than I recall it when I was 16... there were still the usual malay dudes at the side hanging out doing what they do best, NOTHING! No security in sight. No staff in sight. Brilliant.

Maybe they upgraded the machinery. Nope. I think it is the EXACT same bloody machines they had 11 years ago. Heres a sidetrack story about me and the machines.

I spent like a coupla seconds trying to figure out how to work the machine. Ok. Click Central. Thats my destination. Done. Wait. How come the fare did not come out. No instructions. Nothing. Odd. Is the machine spoilt? *looks around for help but no one is there*

A few minutes later... it struck me... at the corner of the damn machine, it said 'sehala' (one way) 'balik' (return) 'mingguan' (weekly). The MYSTERY WAS SOLVED! And I felt like a complete idiot. But then. No freaking instructions! How hard can it be to add in a simple instruction like that at the top.

My biggest bitch is that EVERYTHING is in bloody MALAY. I know its the national language and all, but its visit Malaysia year right? What about the tourists? What about poor sods like me who don't know how to read bloody Malay to save their lives? Developing country? One that doesn't even have basic instructions in the international language. What a JOKE.

So armed with my hard fought ticket, I go to the platforms to wait for my train. NO SIGNS of which direction was for which station. NONE whatsoever. You're expected to be pyshic and feel the force. Hmmm the force in this train is headed towards lots of angry people stuck in a jam. Ah! KL!

If I didn't call my friend earlier for instructions I would have probably got on the wrong side of the track. Malaysian authorities are so thoughtful.

Any way I was disgusted at the state of the place. There were morons smoking near children. Ciggerette buds all over the floor. Garbage. And this was in the MORNING. Imagine what it is like in the evenings or at night.

After waiting for what seemed like forever (a normal occurence for Malaysian public transport... this too has not changed) the train arrived. As usual the people make me sick. They don't wait for people to get OUT of the train. They RUSH into the train pushing and shoving, rushing for the ample seats. Come on la. There were like 10 people getting on to the train and millions of empty seats. But no... the POLITENESS in Malaysians just took over.

So I got shoved around a bit. Nevermind. At least the train was clean and the seats comfortable. The only thing that has impressed me so far... and sadly the only thing that WILL impress me.

Now I've been on the London tube and the Singaporean one too. Malaysia's KTM does compare to it in terms of speed. Yup. Like comparing a one legged midget to a steroid junked up Ben Johnson. The train was practically going backwards!

Finally I reach my destination. KL Central. The pride of Malaysia. It was decent la. Clean, well sign posted. Security. Staff to ask questions. Ok so it was not too bad. Pretty ok. So I went about my business in KL Central. And when I was done. I wanted to head back to Subang Parade.

I have the sense of direction of a blind badger. I'm more likely to fart my way into a coven of witches than to find my way back to where I want to go. So I do the logical thing. I ask for directions. Some were polite. But of little help. Most of them gave me fast food chain restaurants as land marks for the platform to Subang Parade. Which of course were of no use.

One particularly snide person even asked me 'What do I look like? The information counter?' To which I replied 'No, you look too stupid to be of any information at all. I'm sorry,' and left.

I walked for 30 minutes before finding my way to the platform. Good exercise. Not so good for my time.

So that was my little adventure with our local KTM system. Long may it live, so that it might ACTUALLY IMPROVE.

Nah. Pigs would fly.

Mystery unveiled!

The Japanese have finally revealed a mystery for us.How does the small arrow on your computer monitor work when we move the mouse?Haven't you ever wondered how your mouse works?

Now, through the miracle of high technology, we can see how it is done. With the aid of a
screen magnifying lens, the mechanism becomes apparent.Click on the link below and you will find out.

The image may take a minute or two to download and when it appears, slowly move your mouse over the light gray circle and you will see how the magic works. Be sure to stop and start again, too.Follow this link and find out the truth

http://www.1-click.jp/

Hello Blondies

BLONDE LOGIC

Two blondes living in California were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away... Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?????"

CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor" She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"

SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"

RIVER WALK

There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?" The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."

AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it. "Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me." The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream. The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you? "Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde." "I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."

KNITTING

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!" "NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"

BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We were the first on the moon!" The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!" The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"

IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?" "HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!"

Fooling around with the blog a bit

changed the pictures and set a new template...
not so happy with it at the moment

EVEN unhappier that lost my links to my blogger friends... so do me a favor if you want your site linked here... either msg me on msn with your web address or leave a comment here

C I L F's

something I came across while surfing some forums...

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1761079

quite a disturbing video... about this dude's fetishes for cartoon characters... its called C.I.L.F, Cartoons I'd Like to F*ck...

The lyrics are pretty good... but the dude who sings them really looks like a perv... fits the role of a C.I.L.F hunter alright... *shudder*

I'll never look at Jasmine the same way again...

oh and this is pseudo safe for work... no porn ... just some cussing... enjoy

I love kids

http://minjo.multiply.com/video/item/3

And this kid is no different... she's super cute... do check out the video...

Load of friends my age already have kids or are even on their second child! I'm getting old... or those people are really getting a head start! *think*think* Nah... I'm getting old :(

I still want daughters... they smell better than sons :p

What it takes to be a Walmart Greeter

An office manager at Walmart was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question.

Their answer would determine which of them would get the job. The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, the interviewer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?"

Acknowledging the first man on his right, the man replied, "A THOUGHT."It just pops into your head. There's no warning that it's on the way; it's just there. A thought is the fastest thing I know of."

"That's very good!" replied the interviewer."And now you sir?" he asked the second man.

"Hmm.! Let me see. A BLINK ! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of."

"Excellent!" said the interviewer. "The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliché for speed." He then turned to the third man who was contemplating his reply.

Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light in the barn comes on in less than an instant. Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of."

The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man."It's hard to beat the speed of light," he said. Turning to `Bubba`, the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question.

Old Bubba replied, "After hearing the three previous answers, It's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA."

"WHAT!?" said the interviewer, stunned by the response.

"Oh I can explain." said Old Bubba. "You see the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but, before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already shit in my pants."

Look for Bubba at your local Wal-mart.

Don't you just hate it when red necks are right?

Love poems

WOMAN'S POEM

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man,
who's not a creep,

One who's handsome,
smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,

One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call,
not wait for weeks.

I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash,
won't be annoyed.

Pulls out my chair
and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.

Oh! Send me a man
who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"

I pray that this man
will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.


MAN'S POEM
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with a tight ass and perky boobs who owns a liquor store, gun shop, game farm and a golf course. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit

_______________________________________________________

Insert witty comments... cause I'm in a shitty mood and can't be bothered to today...

Wanna freak out the neighbours? This is a campaign run by JWT according to my bro... first you tie the missile balloons to your car... then you drive like a maniac... and watch the missiles chase after your car.... and even more fun... watch the people around you freak out!

I want one of those balloons... can you imagine people on the federal highway moving out of your way when they see the missiles? Sure way to clear traffic la!.... don't play play....

edit: it crossed my mind that I could do this with female fans! have a whole bunch of female balloons... then i'd have like my own groupies when I drive... how cool is that! the only problem would be that they would be floating... and look like ghosts... not the kinda fans I want after all @@'

My name sake

For those of you who didn't know... I was named after Vincent Van Gogh... here are some of his relatives... corny I know... but oh well... what else did you expect from me? :p

His dizzy aunt
Verti Gogh

The brother who ate prunes
Gotta Gogh

The brother who worked at a convenience store
Stop n Gogh

The grandfather from Yugoslavia
U Gogh

The cousin from Illinois
Chica Gogh

His magician uncle
Where-diddy Gogh

His Mexican cousin
A mee Gogh

The Mexican cousin's American half-brother
Gring Gogh

The nephew who drove a stage coach
Wells-far Gogh

The constipated uncle
Can' t Gogh

The ballroom dancing aunt
Tang Gogh

The bird lover uncle
Flamin Gogh

The fruit loving cousin
Man Gogh

An aunt who taught positive thinking
Way-to-Gogh

The little bouncy nephew
Poe Gogh

A sister who loved disco
Go Gogh

Dreams

I had a dream a few nights ago... well more like a nightmare... I was walking down a parking lot and everywhere I looked I saw old faces... of friends that I've missed or not seen for ages and ages... it was a sad dream... I woke up feeling wistful and slightly depressed...

today I got a msg from a friend I've not heard from since I was in high school... 11 years... he's married to a lovely gal and has children... I'm not sure how many at the moment... he was one of my closest friends in Nottingham... though he teased me mercilessly... :)

so was my dream a promination? I wonder...

either way its fantastic to get in touch with my high school mates again... I am content...

now all I have to do is study for that freaking PR exam on monday... *SIGH*

I'm in no mood for the books... if only I could post pone it... but why delay any more... I might as well face it and get it over with... which means tommorow will be a long day... hitting the books... not sleeping... driving to college... taking the exam... then finally reaching home to sleep...

I've walked this path many times I guess... last minute revision...

lets hope it doesn't fail me now...

Would you trust your woman enough... to have her point a gun at your head?

http://www.breitbart.tv/?p=3906



This guy did... and look where he ended up... 6 feet beneath the ground...

kinky sex? can eat?

can! stockings, pee.... poo... all sorts of eatables... just not very nice to eat thats all... but taking it one step further and having a loaded gun pointed at your head... whoah... thats like the real hardcore shit man... I don't think lil vince would be excited if I had a loaded gun pointed at my head... in fact he might just take a hike and run for his life since his owner is too stupid to do the same...

brings a whole new method to castration doesn't it?

but seriously, are people having sex that much that normal sex is boring? that they have to add that extra spice... or bullets in this case to their sex life?

whipped cream... yummy
hand cuffs... okay
whips... ouch
stockings... sexeh?
uniforms.... yes please!

loaded gun.... HOLY MOTHER OF GOD... WTH?

What on earth is wrong with people nowadays... White people are the torch bearers of today... wait and see copy cat cases in Malaysia... its bound to happen!

To me... sex is a simple thing.... wife blows head (little head)... not blows AWAY head (big head)... thats just WRONG.... TAT!!!! please try again... wrong answer.... you lose... go straight to jail... do not turn back... do not collect life insurance... cause you killed the poor bastard you call a boyfriend or husband...

Gods... even the Japs... who are sick enough... think used school girl undies... strawberry poo... even these sickos are not dumb enough to point LOADED guns at the lovers head...

When people say I went my date with a loaded gun... it means you haven't jacked off or had sex in a while... it DOES NOT freaking mean BULLETS and shit...

dear god... the stupidity of it all astounds me

The power of a divorce!

After being married for 44 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said 'Honey, 44 years ago we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watch a 10-inch black and white tv, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 25 year old gal.'

Now i have a $500,000.00 home, a $45,000.00 car, a nice big bed and a plasma screen tv, but I'm sleeping with a 65 year old woman. It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things!'

My wife is a very 'reasonable' woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 25 year old gal, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white tv.


Divorce? An expensive transaction no doubt. Look at the extent people will go through to avoid their assets being ripped off from them.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/showbiz/showbiznews.html?in_article_id=386557&in_page_id=1773&ico=Homepage&icl=TabModule&icc=News&ct=5

Even if he did mean to divorce her, the 200 million pound fine would definitely make poor Paul McCartney think twice about dumping the gold digger.

My question is: 'Why is it in this day and age, women still benefit from divorces?'

In a time when most middle management is monopolised by women. A time where most women have careers and are rapidly climbing up the cooperate ladder, men still lose their property, money and assets when getting a divorce. Isn't this a bit of cave man thinking? Or perhaps I should say cave woman thinking since it benefits WOMEN.

Women are probably doing better in most cases then men are when it comes to making money, and yet the law slaps these 'fines' on MEN! Whats the deal man? Women aren't the weak, soft knee'd creatures of the past, they are the fearsome predators of today.

Marriage is a big deal thing indeed. If you're rich and pick the wrong chick to play hide the salami with for life, you in deep shit. Kiss good bye half of your lifetimes hard work, blood and sweat. It's ridiculous isn't it?

Unless there are children involved. Then I can understand. Assuming the children go with the mother as is the traditional case. Nature dictates that children are instinctively closer to their mother than their father. Under the normal circumstances of course. There are definitely exceptions to this case.

But like I said, unless there are children involved, I truely do not see the point of halving a man's assets to a woman he no longer loves. Or a woman who no longer loves him.

Living in sin. Or put in simple English being together without getting married seems a viable option to me. Though your children will be bastards. But the stigma in most countries isn't a bad as it used to be. Life partners is what they call themselves. Some eventually get married when they feel commited enough to do so. Others live happilly together in the comfort of each others love without having to subject themselves to a formal holistic wedding. Think out of the box. Marriage is the box. In more than one cases.

Studies have shown however, couples that co habit, have like a 400% additional risk of getting divorced than couples who did not cohabit before marriage. Interesting fact. I would have thought that it would be the opposite. Married people get into marriage not knowing what they're getting into fully, since they don't know the 'darkside' of their partners. Come on. WE ALL have our darksides, and we hide them well. When you live with some one, you can't hide your bad habits forever.

Instead, those who cohabit, tend to take things for granted when their married, report a loss in respect for their spouse, lack commitment in the marriage and even report the 'stuck' feeling. They are also more likely to cheat on their partners than those who did not cohabit. Sex is something that is taken lightly apparently.

I do not know how accurate the studies are. But thats what they show.

Perhaps the answer is NOT to get married. And to just cohabitate instead since marriage brings so much additional pressure and financial risks! Life partners can be just as commited to each other when compared with marriage spouses. It just lacks the legality.

In Malaysia however, marriage is a must for several different reasons. Firstly, if you are Malay, and caught living alone with a member of the opposite sex, you can be brought to a religious court for 'khalwat'. So living together is a dangerous option for Malays.

Secondly, the reputation of the woman is at stake. She'd be a social 'pariah' at social functions. Looked upon as a loose woman with no morals. Having sex before marriage. What a joke... after all we ALL know that a huge percentage of women lose their virginity BEFORE marriage and/or have had multiple partners.

Children from such relationship suffer having to answer questions like 'How come your parents aren't married?' 'Don't your parents love each other enough to be married?' Quite scarring for the kids.

But how much more scaring is a divorce? A divorce can change a childs life. Arguably, when life partners separate, their children are scarred as well. However, they do not have to go through the legal battles for custody that married couples some times indulge themselves in.

Such a hypocritcal society. It makes me sad.

Virgins are hailed for their self control. Ever think about the fact they could have done EVERYTHING BUT SEX itself. Does that make them innocent? Does that make them pure? Hell no. A woman who has given 1000 blow jobs is deemed more pure than a woman who has had sex with her first love once. How ironic. How stupid.

I'm not saying virginity is over rated. But the definition of virginity itself needs to be reevaluated. Virginity should not merely compose of the act of sex itself, rather any sexual activities in general. Doesn't that make 99% of the population non virgins? You go figure.

Irish drinking :D

Paddy had been drinking at his local Dublin pub all day and most of the night. Mick, the bartender, says "You'll not be drinking any more tonight, Paddy."Paddy replies "OK Mick, I'll be on my way then".

Paddy spins around on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his face. "What the...." he says and pulls himself up by the stool and dusts himself off.He takes a step towards the door and falls flat on his face again. "Damn!" he says.He looks to the doorway and thinks that if he can just get to the door and get some fresh air he'll be fine.

He belly crawls to the door and shimmies up the door frame. He sticks his head outside and takes a deep breath of fresh air, feels much better and takes a step out onto the pavement and falls flat on his face."Bi'Jesus... I'm soused," he says.

He can see his house just a few doors down, and decides to try for it. He crawls down the street and shimmies up the door frame, opens the door and looks inside. He takes a look up the stairs and says,"No flappin' way." But he somehow crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and thinks, "I think I can make it to the bed."

He takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face again. He says, "This is hell. I gotta stop drinking," but manages to crawl to the bed and fall in.

The next morning, his wife comes into the room carrying a cup of coffee and says, "Get up Paddy. Did you have a bit of drink last night?"

Paddy says, "I did Jess. I was totally pissfaced. But how'd you know?"

"Mick called.. You left your wheelchair at the pub."

off topic: again thanks debs for the joke

Can you imagine getting so drunk that you can't remember that you are wheel chair bound? I'm afraid quite a few of my friend could probably imagine me doing that! My love for alcohol knows no bounds.... get it? bound... bounds?

eerr... moving on swiftly...

From Debs yet again

There was a man who had worked all of his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real miser when it came to his money. Just before he died, he said to his wife, 'When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me.'

And so he got his wife to promise him with all of her heart that when he died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him. Well, he died. He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there in black, and her friend was sitting next to her.

When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, 'Wait just a minute!' She had a box with her; she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down, and they rolled it away.

Her friend said, 'I know you weren't fool enough to put all that money in there with your husband.'

The loyal wife replied 'Listen, I'm a Christian; I can't go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money in that Casket with him.'

'You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him!!!!?''

I sure did' said the wife. 'I got it all together, put it into my account and wrote him a cheque. IF HE CAN CASH IT HE CAN SPEND IT!!!!

Naughty boy!

Isn't this kid a bit too young to be staring at boobies... well his inexperience definitely shows tho... cause the experienced eye will tell you... there ARE NO boobies to stare at on this chick!

but you've got to love that sly smile he has on his face... if it were a grown up, they're probably get a face job via nasty slaps... but this is a kid, so his being ham sap is cute!

I wish I were a kid again... knowing the things I know... and having done the things I've done... then I'd get to do it all over again!

Can you imagine the looks of your standard one Moral teachers face when you ask, 'If God's so great, why are people dying and suffering all over the world?'

I'd like to hear one of our crappy manufactured Moral teachers struggle with such a philosophical question, coming from a seven year old kid! Would be hilarious... even adults struggle with that question... never really giving a satisfying answer... what more our moronic standard one teachers?

Playing games like Dr! Dr! Would have a whole new meaning if you were young again... I mean the things you'd know to do to the other person.... actually this train of thought is quite disturbing... so lets lose it =S

Test and exams would be a breeze... after all the crap we've learned in college... 1 + 1 is hardly a challenge... well unless you're a total moron... or completely hopeless at maths... like me :D

Your love life! Imagine with the experience you have... you'd know exactly how to charm people... the right things to say... the right things to do... tho I imagine kids would be more interested in pokemon... then poke me at that age... then again, if you're butt ugly, there no help for you no matter what experience you have!

The cool thing would be being super intelligent for your age... and mature... you'd get to do things that you always wanted to do but never had the chance to... like put pins on your teachers seat so that when they sit they jump into the ceilling... oh... we're talking about intelligence and maturity :( Sorry... even now I struggle with those two issues...

Plus you'd have the limitless energy and physical fitness that children have! We all know how fucking hyper active kids can be.... it would be fun pissing people off with your energy rather than trying to strangle a kid to death for moving and talking at the speed of light with the attention span of a butterfly (the kid... not you)

And omg... you get to start doing alcohol FRESH... it takes like half a can to knock out a kid... can you imagine how much money you'll save on booze?

Wait thats something I forgot to mention... we don't HAVE any money when we're kids :(.... Oh well... I don't have any money now either... so I'm hardly gonna miss that :p

Ahh.. to be young again... and to face all those disappointments and fuck ups from square one...

on second thoughts...

thank God I'm 27....

Nifty lil links

I made some links for the ease of browsing through my blog... I'm so sensitive to your needs :D... so u can clicky clicky and check out whats what ;p...

took me a while to figure out how to do it being the moron that I am when it comes to computers... be appreciative u bastards!

I also updated the blog list of my friends... you guys really move blogs too often! Save me the work and stick to one address *waves fist*